Survivors & Volunteers

The Star Fish Story

Once a man was walking along a beach. The sun was shining and it was a beautiful day. Off in the distance he could see a person going back and forth between the surf’s edge and the beach. Back and forth this person went. As the man approached he could see that there were hundreds of starfish stranded on the sand as the result of the natural action of the tide.

The man was stuck by the apparent futility of the task. There were far too many starfish. Many of them were sure to perish. As he approached the person continued the task of picking up starfish one by one and throwing them into the surf.

As he came up to the person he said, “You must be crazy. There are thousands of miles of beach covered with starfish. You can’t possibly make a difference.” The person looked at the man. He then stooped down and picked up one more starfish and threw it back into the ocean. He turned back to the man and said, “It sure made a difference to that one!”

FEEDBACK FROM SURVIVORS OF DOMESTIC ABUSE

FROM OUR VOLUNTEERS

Good morning. My name is Alexandra S. and I am here to tell you a little bit about the YWCA’s women’s shelter that I serve at. This shelter is in Over-the-Rhine and is for women and children who had escaped their home because of abusive husbands and fathers. My sister, my Mom and I have preciously helped at this shelter and served dinner there. This organization appreciates any outside help possible.

The women’s shelter appreciates any money donations you make, but they especially love it when you use the money that you have collected or the money you are willing to donate to buy actual items such as clothing, food, toiletries like washcloths, soap, toothbrushes and toothpaste. They do love any donations people are willing to give.

Once a month, you can go and serve dinner to these women and children in their cafeteria. We have also participated in gathering Christmas gifts for the mothers and children at the shelter. My sister and a few of her friends raised a lot of money having a lemonade stand and a cookie stand over the Summer, and I look to do the same, to raise money for the shelter with my “peace and justice” project. I also have sold lemonade in the summer and have donated clothing for the children.

I plan to go to the shelter with my Mom and sister and serve more meals and gradually help them get back on their feet with their jobs and life. This is just one example how we can create peace and justice in the world. I like to help this organization because I know it must be so hard for the mothers and children to leave their husbands and fathers and live without them. I think it is so upsetting for both the children and the mother. They come to this shelter extremely overwhelmed and I feel it is our job as privileged and fortunate citizens to go and help our fellow neighbors, who are not as fortunate and privileged as we are.

It is rewarding to do this because you know that even if they don’t show it through their exterior expression, they really do appreciate all of your help and kindness. Sometimes, some of the women and children don’t show any appreciation at all or just stare at you. At first I was disappointed that I didn’t get more thanks for what I was doing, but you have to remember that these people were probably not raised in very good circumstances. You just have to know that they really do appreciate what you do for them in their heart, and whether they show their appreciation or not, you know that you are doing it for Jesus. Thank you!
–Alexandra, 12 year old daughter of a FFF volunteer

“I became involved at the shelter because I have a close family member who was abused as a child…my own mother. I have seen, through her eyes, the long- term effects of this abuse into her adult life and I vowed to protect not only my own children but to reach out to others at-risk and do what I am able. God has blessed me with many gifts and I want to share them with others. I have regularly served dinners at the shelter with my own children to help them recognize the needs of others and to impress on them a sense of empathy and obligation to assist others. My children are currently ages 9, 6, and 4 years. Each has been to the shelter to serve and has brought their own special ray of sunshine into the life of others…whether it be just a smile, a cookie, or a word of encouragement to the other children residing there. As a member of Families for Families, we fill in the gaps for women and children at the shelter by providing donations of goods and services as well as fundraising for specific needs like children’s recreational equipment or medicines. Please consider joining and supporting our group so that we may reach out even further.”

–FFF volunteer since 2004

“When I grew up my Mother was the victim of my father’s psychological abuse. For as long as I can remember he tried – and succeeded – to keep her small and with the feeling of no self worth. I can still see her standing in the kitchen crying, trying to hide her tears from my brother and I. When my Mother tried to separate from my father he made sure that she, my brother and myself would have been left with no means and nowhere to go … and so she stayed. Years later my parents finally separated because after a string of affairs my father met another woman. Today my Mother is stronger and happier then ever, but nobody will ever be able to return the lost 20 years to her. I believe that no woman should be forced to stay with an abusive spouse. I hope to make the Battered Women’s Shelter a better place and give the women the attention, care and a change on life every human being deserves.”

–FFF volunteer since 2005